Closed Mind

Hey guys:D!

I don’t know where to begin, the last week has been insane full of work, no rest & no play I don’t think I was ever mentally prepared with how hard this year was going to be and I’m struggling, its been really hard. Being in the big wide world by yourself is hard I’ve come to the realisation that no one helps you out of and if they do, it always comes with terms & conditions.

I’ll give you an example the other day I missed one of my morning lectures due to having a hypo in the middle of the night because of my diabetes. The next morning I had to go and see my teacher to let her know why I missed the lesson and she said why don’t you ask for help or ask for extra credits if it might be hard for you to keep up your attendance and I replied with I’m not eligible because it’s a long term illness the university expects you to be able to deal with it. It’s like people find every excuse in order to not help someone its as if the quality of being genuine is slowly fading away.

I’ve also been away from home for almost a month now and I cannot wait for next weekend, on Friday I can get in my car with my pathetic small bag containing tonnes of work and a few spare clothes to get home and give my parents and my sisters the biggest hug possible. I cant wait to sit in my living room with my family and spend some quality time with them, I really miss them let’s face it that work won’t even leave my bag…

I’ve actually been really busy with university that I’ve actually haven’t had time to think or to take a step back and reflect on what I’m doing. I haven’t even had time to plan my social life or to think I’m going out tonight, I’m going to call my friend. I feel boring, the only human interaction I have are with my class mates because at the moment it’s just been setting my alarm for the morning, going to uni, coming home, doing work, cooking dinner, going to bed and repeat the cycle again and again…

There’s just no fun, I have nothing exciting to do I don’t even want to go out all my energy is being put into doing work, all I want to do is just go home and get into bed that’s what I look forward too the most. I need to break out of this and go out I know what I need, I need the sea I need waves going up and down up and down…

My update on doing nothing and being boring is finished

lifeisfunbeingme X 

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