I can see the finish line…

I cannot believe it but the time has finally come to end this chapter in my life! In 2 weeks time I will have finished university, my degree in Media Communication will be over, I will receive my last ever student loan in 2 days and in 15 days time I start my new job… I am absolutely terrified but YAY me I got myself a job just days after handing in my last deadline…

I’ve not mentioned it yet but the Social Media Editor job I applied for which I mentioned in Aprils I was unsuccessful in due to lacking experience in the analytics sector. However I am happy to be able to say I got a job as a receptionist for the same publishing company instead which gives me the chance for me to grow, improve on my writing and work my way up which I see as a positive so for the moment I’m Rosa Aversa – Receptionist.

I really am sad that I’m leaving Cardiff, I like to think I will leave with a bit of Welsh inside me BUT I would love to say I picked up some of the accent I’d just be kidding myself because my Bristolian accent is so damn prominent, friends greet me with, ‘Alright Roserrr!’ Theres no way in hell I can even attempt the Welsh accent… even though it is one of my favorites! 

I will leave Cardiff with some amazing memories from over the last two years and to be honest I’m kind of glad that my parents don’t invest the time to read my blog so I can actually write my uni story… 

When I was younger I was always the odd one out, I wasn’t allowed to do much due to having strict parents then when I reached 18 years old my parents didn’t want me to go to university and for that reason I took a year out and did a hairdressing course. To be honest it served me well as I do my roommates hair so if all else fails I will always have a plan Z.

I then went to university in my home town and absolutely hated it I made no friends I was still living at home my parents treated me like a child still and I literally spent the whole year in tears and with a constant frown, I kind of gave my parents the silent treatment for a while because I felt resentments towards them, I felt like they were ruining my life, my opportunities and I did not want to grow up and regret my younger years. I was determined to change university and live the student life, without the support of anyone I set about doing the necessary paper work and transferred, although my parents didn’t like it I did it and I never felt so free, so liberated I just went with the flow and I moved to Cardiff.

University is meant to be the most thought out decision of our lives like your meant read all the prospectus, visit the uni’s weigh out your options but this is my story and I did none of that because my parents didn’t come with me and they didn’t have the time as they’ve always always been busy. However 2 of my best friends from college came to Cardiff for uni and during my first year I came and visited them for a night out and it was one of the best nights out I have ever had. When I went to transfer I really wanted to go to Middlesex in London because they had Erasmus connections with New York and Italy, for me it would have been amazing to study in those countries but unfortunately you can’t always have what you want and they rejected my application I see it as their loss anyway. So in choosing my plan B university I had the option to go to a few other of which I hadn’t visited and didn’t have a clue where some of them were to be honest but I remember my night out in Cardiff and for that sole reason I just accepted, went for it and moved here…

I will never forget my first day when I moved my dad looked sad almost angry I was going but I didn’t care I had to do this for me I wanted to feel free feel normal for once and be able to join into a conversation and say, ‘OMG I actually know what your on about!’ It was the strangest feeling moving into a new house but the best sensation was waking up the day after and not having rules all my friends from back home were wary of me moving out they all said your not going to cope but I did! I proved everyone wrong and I sort of went absolutely wild, I mean what else are you going to do?!  

I would go out with my roommates twice even three times a week we would get absolutely hammered I would spend nights throwing up, talking to guys I had never met before taking their number, it was just awesome! I learnt to cope by myself, I went to uni I made new friends and some of which I hope will end up being friends for life. I became confident again, I was happy, life was finally what I wanted with not a worry in the world apart from having a overdraft the size of someone’s monthly mortgage due to my stupid loan coming in late umm…thanks a lot guys for screwing me over!  The feeling of not having money is horrible!

Then Christmas arrived and I started to wee a lot and felt super thirsty like I would be drinking buckets of water and would still feel thirsty it was ridiculous, I went to the doctors and they ran a diabetic test on me due to my mum also being diabetic and it came back positive:(! My whole world came crashing down on me… now a tonne of people tell me it could be worse I would like to let you know that I know IT COULD! So don’t remind me just let me sad about it and be there for me otherwise keep your opinion to yourself 🙂

I then lost my confidence yet again and I’ve never been able to get it back:( I felt like I was in school again, now I don’t have many high school memories due to being bullied a lot and I’ve had trouble with feeling confident ever since! I feel like those horrible people have won in life as they have carried on while I’m left in pieces:( I hate this illness, I really do but there’s nothing I can do because there’s no cure, I wish I didn’t have it! I had to learn how much insulin to take for every meal, calculate how many carbs I ate, learn how many carbs are in a potato, carrots yeah I didn’t know that either but carrots have carbs in them I couldn’t care less but I need to know it for my health! I had to have my driving licence re-evaluated to make sure I was capable to drive I had to adjust to the fact of doing 5 injections a day and on top that stay on top of my sugars to make sure ultimately I dont go into a diabetic coma. Since then I’ve not been the same, I panic, I’m scared people judge me I hate having to do my injections and measure my sugars in public I feel  like I’m centre of attention and all eyes are on me:( I just find it hard… 

3rd year was a lot better before I started I went on a girls holiday to Magaluf, it was insane it was just night out after night out of getting drunk clubbing and going to bed at 10am but  one thing that bugged me was we were in this club called BCM one of the biggest in Europe and I paid 40 euros for the damn ticket, it was free bar from 10pm til 6am and I was in their sober due to not being allowed to drink with this stupid illness and ever since I have been all over the place…

3rd year has been awesome, I kind of came out my shell a bit I went to a pub quiz every week for the first few months, and actually knew the answer for one question it was about Bridget Jones I was so happy I knew it I shouted out, ‘HA I know this one!’ Everyone turned around slightly embarrassing, although I used to enjoy putting in the £1 and taking the winnings because my friends are 10 times cleverer than me. It’s been amazing I’ve literally lived in the library I’ve had an amazing house my roommates are awesome I’m gonna miss them so much next year :(!! 

I can actually come away from uni saying, it started shit but I turned it around, I met some awesome people who I’m going to miss so much, I’ve actually already bought waterproof mascara for graduation because I know what I’m like, I will definitely cry! I lived the student life, I went clubbing like all the time, I have a tonne of drunken stories and yeah I did it, I made myself happy! Although if I had a chance to rewind I would do it all again but this time apply for Cardiff uni instead of the university of South Wales and maybe change the degree I studied and apply for psychology and advertising  or if that didn’t exist apply for media and sociology BUT if I did that I wouldn’t have the friends I have today…

I cannot believe I can see the finish line and it makes me so sad because I’m not ready to give up this chapter in my life… I want it to go on forever 😦

ASadLifeisfunbeingme X


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